"i see a light... it's so beautiful!"

Do you recognize that Bug's Life quote? :)

I got really excited today. I was officially approved for graduation, got fitted for my graduation regalia, AND picked out my college ring. Craziness- I graduate in 60 days!!

This semester's been good- even though I'm only taking 9 hours, I've earned an A on everything I've done, including my midterm for American Lit! Right now I'm focusing on a presentation I have to give for that class on Thursday. 10 minutes long, over Walt Whitman. There is just not enough research on the topic I'm doing.... but it's almost over! After Thursday, I will be 100% happy girl.

Well, not much is new... job fair next Tuesday! Maybe I'll get hired? :)

Here's my story... as of late..

Long time no see? Sorry about that. :)

Life has been great. A lot has occurred since my last entry, so I shall update thee:

Academically, things are going well. In fact, there is a lot to be said for this area. I made the huge decision not to teach this semester, and that puts me at a point where I need only 3 classes in the fall to graduate! Yes. :) This semester has been rough though. I've been in 2 classes where I needed field experience, and it has been torture. Okay, that's a strong word. But it hasn't been the best experience. I am thankful for these classes because I realize that I do NOT want to teach. Ever. You may remember a post of mine back in December where I referenced my desire to go into speech pathology. These plans are definite- I even visited a school yesterday. I got to meet with the dean of the department and even got a personal tour. I know I'm a nerd (which I am totally okay with) because I have made it a standard that whichever school I choose has an exceptional library with very good hours. Anyways, I'm going to be working full time this summer in San Antonio (Where? I don't know. Possibly with a newspaper as a journalist- it's something I've always secretly wanted to do.) and taking a prep course at UTSA for the GRE. I HAVE to score high on this exam. My goal is to get anything above a 1300. I'll keep you posted. :) I've been in contact with many grad schools across Texas that have a Speech Pathology program- ACU, Lamar, Texas State, OLLU, Baylor, TWU, and UNT. I am planning on applying to all of them. So, once I graduate in December, it is off to grad school for 3 years. This may sound like a lot to you but I know that this will be worth it. If you want to know more about this, feel free to ask me! :)

My classes that I am taking right now have been going well too. If you ever need me, I'm probably off diagramming sentences for grammar, or writing essays for rhetoric. I'm really enjoying those classes. :) Next fall (my LAST semester as an undergraduate!), I will be taking Poetry, Literary Periods and Genres, and American Literature I. It is absolutely crazy that that is all I need!

Well, I hope you are all doing well.
Until next time!
~Krista

Teaching!

I'm taking two education classes this semester: Curriculum Methods and Classroom Management. For each class, I need to do 26 hours of field experience, putting me at 52 hours this semester. I'm not quite sure how this will work considering I have school and 2 jobs... but it will work. I promise! :)

Anyways, that was me going off on a tangent again. Today I met the two teachers I will be working alongside this semester, and I felt so good about it. They were both so encouraging and offered me many resources to help me in my teaching career. One even gave me the book "Night" by Elie Wiesel (which I have wanted to read for a while. We both agreed that the lessons I would teach this semester would be over that book. We discussed the Holocaust, Wiesel's beautiful words and writing, and of course- the life of a teacher. She told me how stressful it can be, yet how rewarding. I was deeply encouraged by everything she told me.

As we sat and talked in her overly crowded (by desks) classroom, I felt like everything I have been preparing for is so right. I'm going to be honest and tell you that I have questioned the career I have chosen. But I know that I sought the Lord in prayer about this very intently, and I know that He has a plan. As I walked through the highschool hallways today, I knew that what I was doing was exactly where I needed to be. While many of the students I saw today were taller than me, I still felt older than them. I know that sounds crazy, but I have feared that I would not be confident walking through the hallways of a highschool as a teacher, but today God brought that peace.

After hearing about some of these student's lives, my heart went out to them. Our world is full of so much that we choose to overlook. There are 15 year old students that see school as their only safe haven. I am excited for what is to come. I know it will be rough, but I am so ready to see what God has planned.

I start in the classrooms next week. Before, my biggest fear was feeling confident, but now- my worry is, "What will I wear?!" (That's right, I STILL have not deveoped my teaching wardrobe...)

Twisted logic??

So you may think this sounds odd... but it makes sense to me! I have decided that not being a morning person may actually be a good thing! Hear me out.... Because I am most definitely not a morning person, I feel tired whether I slept for 8 hours or for 3! I decided that this morning when I woke up at 7 after finally falling to sleep around 3:30 or 4. I will never take for granted a sore-free throat again!! :)

Anyways, I have 3 classes today. I've already been to two: General Psychology (I've been putting that one off for a while. The teacher is very spunky! Especially for 8 am!)and Advanced Rhetoric, which seems like it will be an interesting class. The teacher is very laid back, so that's nice! I have Advanced Grammar at 1, which I am very scared of!! Anyways, I'm trying very hard to stay on top of my classes early! My friends Edgar and Analy and I are going to Starbucks tonight to all read for our classes. So hopefully we get a lot done!!

Hope you are all doing good! Good luck to all the students this semester! :)

Home! :) and a little randomness!

So I'm home now. I can smell the lovely scent of my mom's Apple Cake. How will I survive until tomorrow without biting into it?! :)

It's nice to be home. I'm just sitting in "my" room and relaxing. I'm acknowledging this because I do not want to take for granted the time I have now to rest... next semester won't be too bad... I don't think. I'm taking Advanced Grammar, which is supposedly the hardest class for English majors. I am still excited about it because I know there is so much about grammar that I don't know, but I've always wanted to. I'm also taking Advanced Rhetoric, Curriculum Methods, Classroom Management, and an easy one- General Psychology. I also find out where I will be student teaching. I'm not sure if I want Salado or Belton yet... so I will probably be observing in both districts to get a better idea. I think next semester's going to be fun, also! :)

Guatemala notes: I start fundraising next semester!! My Guatemala trip will be set for sometime June or July this summer... I get to choose the dates. It will be a prayer/relational ministry and I am very excited!! More updates to come... I will probably make a Guatemala blog, too. My adopted mom, Shanon, will be teaching Spanish classes at church for the Mexico mission trip, and I'm going to go to learn more for Guatemala :) It's very exciting!

Well, I guess I'll leave you with a quote that I read a couple days back:
"May your presence fill the nonanswers, empty glances, and lonely times of my life. Amen." - Robert Wood

"All the world's a stage..."

My favorite class is currently Shakespeare. Just thought I'd share :) We had our midterm today and I think I made an A. I get advised for my last semester of classes next Monday. I will have MWF off, so I'm thinking of a job that I could take.. possibly subbing. I'm pretty excited!!

Lately God has been teaching me more about being real. And that's mainly why I'm writing about this, because I want to be obedient to what He is telling me, and be completely real and not cover anything up. So here goes...

He really had to break me down a couple nights ago... I was babysitting and the kids had gone to sleep and I was pretty tired because I was re-reading some Shakespeare. I got a phone call from one of my guy friends on campus, a fellow English lover, and told him that I couldn't go to a Shakespeare play with the group we had planned. Anyways, a mutual girlfriend of ours was in the background... we hung out earlier this semester, but not so much lately.

You may be thinking, "Yeah, so what's the big deal?" Well, small things usually surface larger feelings. And just so you know, I in no way have any feelings for this guy. But for some reason, God used a simple conversation and realization that my two friends were hanging out without me, and told me that I wasn't being real in my relationships with people. I don't know when this behavior started, but I'm thinking when my dad was deployed. I had told myself that I would not dwell on all the emotion that came with my dad being gone. I knew that I would be strong. But now I know that there is no winning with that battle. You have to deal with your emotions.

I was upset because I don't know these two people in that way. I feel like I haven't been real with anyone in a long time. I haven't told you that sometimes, or most of the time, I don't always have it together. I get stressed out. I compare the way I look with other girls. I'm not always happy with who God made me. But He's teaching me everyday. He's teaching me through pageant, and other things. But I never discuss these things with anyone.

I could sit here and say "Woe be me because I don't have a significant other to share things with and be real with." And I'm not going to make this one of my posts about being single, but God does call us to relationshipS (that's plural) with one another where we carry each other's burdens. I'm tired of hiding the fact that I fail sometimes.

So here it is in all caps: I MESS UP. I AM NOT PERFECT. I HAVE TO LEAN ON MY HEAVENLY FATHER, AND RELY ON MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS. WE ALL HAVE TO. LOVE ONE ANOTHER.

I'm just tired of the superficial, acquaintance-type relationships. So lets go beyond that and actually talk to each other. I'm not going to worry about whether or not I would be revealing too much, because I don't reveal enough at all, and instead, I put up a mask of perfection.... which I hope people have seen through.

Is anyone with me? Does anyone else get bogged down with the false standard of everything being together? Because I am. And I hope that I made you think. Because it's been on my heart lately, and I'm trying to break down walls that I have put up.

I want to be real with you.

*Siiigh* :)

I thought I'd post a picture since I haven't in a while. This was during our first week back at school. I'm standing with all of my "nieces" in my welcome week family from this year. That was our 80s night- we had a dance and everything! It was pretty fun!! :)

I'm listening to Canon in D and decided it was good music to blog to :) Well, this week has been going well. I had my first test today in Creative Writing over Catch 22. I'm not sure how I did, but I guess I'll find out soon enough!!

Last night was our first official pageant practice. We started out with our talents. If you've been reading, you know that I'm miming. I'm pretty confident that I'm going down in UMHB history for that one- I'll have to do my research to be sure. I was 2nd to last in order of performance for practice, so I had a good hour for my anxiety to increase. But, I got up on stage and performed to "I Feel Pretty". People laughed at the right parts, which is a good sign. I was really nervous and did everything so quickly and ended before my music did... so that will be something to worry about :) But everyone said they liked it- so that's good!! Tomorrow night is "evening gown night" so we are all wearing our heels and learning how to walk gracefully. We'll see how that works out!!! :)

I hope everyone is having a good week!

A Rediscovery :)

I really feel as if I'm finding my thing. Or re-discovering it rather. Tonight I had to write a rough draft about an event in my life that could be a short story. As I wrote, I felt the creativity begin. I don't really get frustrated when I get to write. I enjoy it! I'm loving seeing my words on the screen, and knowing that they will be read and can make a difference. I'm very excited about what God is doing with this new passion. I do enjoy reading, and I never thought I'd enjoy writing just as much (maybe even more)! I love talking about other writings, too. I like trying to find the symbolism in others' stories and analyzing.

I'm probably going to be posting some of my assignments on another blog. My little "creative spot". So, be looking for that :) I just thought I would share with you the passions that are growing in my life!

Very glad, with a smile spread across my face... :)

Wow. That is all I have to say. By changing my major to teach high school instead of middle school, I have made a great decision. My classes are so in depth and I am loving every minute of them. My favorite class of the moment is Advanced Composition. We have been reading nonfictional stories lately, and then submitting our response journals online. At first, I felt as if everyone else besides me was somehow above me in their writing, analytical and reflective skills. Today was a major turning point for me. In our class, we are randomly chosen to "teach and take over" the class by our professor. Wouldn't you know it, I was called on today. :) I was nervous, but I came prepared with a list of questions for our reading Independence Day, by Lisa Chavez. At first I was discouraged because I felt as if I didn't clarify my question enough... as if people were just staring at me and blinking. Then, my teacher interrupted and pointed out that the metaphor I had thought of was one he had never heard of and wanted to research more. He told me that I needed to speak up more in class and be more assertive. How's the for a boost of confidence?! I was so excited because I felt as if the only person in the room that I really needed to approve of my question actually really loved it! I'm also thinking that his method of teaching, in allowing us to teach, is the best preparation I could have for student teaching, which is where I will be in one year.

My other classes are interesting, too. In Creative Writing, we are reading Catch-22 and writing poetry. In Shakespeare, we are reading Richard II, and giving oral presentations, as well as writing a very big research paper. In World Literature, we are teaching a lesson geared towards the grade we want to teach that deals with a piece of world literature and current events. In British Literature, we are reading the classics, like Beowulf. Can you sense the excitement I have as I write this? I know that I get overwhelmed with the busyness of it all sometimes, but I do enjoy it. I enjoy reading about peoples' lives and learning their stories. I'm also becoming so much more confident in my own writing, because I do have good experience in that. I had some of the best English teachers you could ask for back in high school. (Those classes kept me going in a way at Judson.)

Needless to say, I am very content. I am enjoying where life is at right now and I couldn't ask for it to be any other way. My parents (yes, plural- my dad is included!!)are coming on Saturday to move in some furniture to the house. I am so excited about our house! It is the cutest little house you will ever see! :)