6/22/2006

Super Babysitter

So, Nathan, the adorable 3 year old I babysit, apparently thinks I am Miss Super Babysitter. His mom and I were talking tonight, and she told me of a conversation they had during their Louisiana trip this week.

Nathan: Can we go see Miss Amy and her baby?

Mommy Rachel: No, Miss Amy is working right now.

Nathan: Oh... is Miss Krista watching him?

Mommy Rachel: No Nathan, Miss Krista only watches you and Anna!


Oh, the way kids look at you. In Nathan's eyes, I take care of all the babies. How cute!

6/21/2006

Only Hope

Oh how seet, to have rest and hope in Him. The words to this song are beautiful.

"Only Hope"

[Written by Switchfoot]

There's a song that's inside of my soul
It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again
I'm awake in the infinite cold
But You sing to me over and over and over again

So I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands
and pray to be only Yours
I pray to be only Yours
I know now you're my only hope

Sing to me the song of the stars
Of Your galaxy dancing and laughing
and laughing again
When it feels like my dreams are so far
Sing to me of the plans that You have for me over again

So I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands and pray
To be only yours
I pray to be only yours
I know now you're my only hope

I give You my destiny
I'm giving You all of me
I want Your symphony
Singing in all that I am
At the top of my lungs I'm giving it back

So I lay my head back down
And I lift my hands and pray
To be only yours
I pray to be only yours
I pray to be only yours
I know now you're my only hope

6/20/2006

Trust in the Lord

I understand that God teaches me something through every trial. That He is constantly pruning me so that I will bear more fruit. (John 15) I re-read that passage today and it was kinf of reassuring that whatever I'm going through right now is going to help me more than harm me, because God is for me.

"I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch of mine that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing."

Oh what a wonderful Comforter I have. He is building my faith to be stronger. And I need that. I am thankful for the friend He gave me to talk to today, for the people in my life that care about me when I am attacked. I am thankful for the smiling faces of the little kids I love to be around.

After work today, I went to Ian's little league game and sat with Christie for a while. We were just watching the game, and I turned around to help Rachel find her ladybug, when all of a sudden I hear a unusual spitting noise coming from Christie, and then all of a sudden, I feel cold water all over the left side of my face. Now, if you know me, you know that I thought this was very disgusting. But how could I tell Christie this when she was already embarrased enough? Well, we had a good laugh about it.

Anyways, I hope you are all doing good. Also, thanks for reading my previous entry and being so understanding. I love you all!

6/19/2006

Oh, gee.

These past couple days for me have been rough. I won't let you know it if I'm talking to you, but for some reason, I'm an open book right now. Isn't it funny how I would feel awkward saying anything but "Good" when you ask me "How are you?".

I think I am just being attacked right now. I haven't been feeling like myself at all. I feel like nothing in my life is going right, and I am feeling dissatisfied with myself. And then it's like my emotions are a light that can just be turned off and on. In front of people, I a very good at turning them off. In fact, I am very good at ignoring the fact that there's even a light to turn on. For some reason though, something inside me desperately wants to turn that light on and place everything out for everyone to see. No more hiding.

I don't know if it has been the empty conversations that I have had with my parents, or if it has been the constant thought that I am not good at anything I attempt- my job, my friendships. Yes, I know this is a lie, and yet while knowing these are all lies, part of me still believs it, and I hate that.

We are doing that study on the book Captivating, and while I really don't agree with a lot of what that book has to say, the discussions that we had on it tonight just really hit me. I cried, but didn't say anything. How could I say anything when I have been ignoring it for it's whole existence? I've noticed that I have been doing this with a lot of the discomforts in my life. I know they are there, and I ignore them, thinking that if I don't acknowledge them, they will somehow vanish. Really, all I am doing is hurting myself. I am hardening my heart, and not bringing these things to the Lord.

I have lost something in myself, and it hurts. It feels like I can't turn to anyone, even if they had their arms opened right in front of me. My heart has been trained to keep it all in and can't even recognize a shoulder to lean on when it is there. I feel as if a friend is standing there trying to help me, and I am too weak to even reach out for their help.

Please pray for me. There are just a lot of things that have led to confusion, hurt, and sadness- and I don't know what to do.

6/12/2006

Who knew?

So, between my last post and now, many things have changed in my life. They may not be significant to you, but they are to me, so I will blog about them :)

Ever since I've moved to Belton, I started my internship and it has been a blast. I've gotten to know the kids a lot more, and I've been planning many events for them. It has been so fun! We are doing so many thing this summer.. including a ZOO trip! I am very excited about that one ;)

I have also taken up running again. I've been running one mile almost every morning at 7:00. Who knew I could get up that early, much less to go running?! It has really been fun though. The neighborhood is just so peaceful and breezy, it makes me want to run. I hope I can keep that habit throughout the year, because it's a good one to have!

I have had a blast so far. Yesterday I came home for my mom's birthday and I'm about to drive back to Belton. Today is my day off, so I am not very worried about getting there on time.

Thursday is Rachel's birthday party and we all get to dress up and go out. I got this really cute dress, I feel like I live in the 50s or 60s- it's very cute. I will have to take pictures of all of us.

It's hard for me to believe that it's summer. During the school year, it felt as if school would never end. Luckily, it did. I was getting worn out after a while! Auguest 7th I'll come back to SA and on the 16th I will move into our APARTMENT!! Complete with our own washer and dryer and a dishwasher. That will make life a little easier!! I'm so excited. I already have my comforter set for the next year :)

I know you want to see a picture, too ;)

I'm going to place the orange one as the comforter, with the patterned one folded in a rectangle at the bottom. If you're my roommate, you'll understand :)


This one is actually bright orange, not green. :)


Okay, that is all I have to say for now! Everyone have a good week!

Love,
Krista