These are my ramblings :)

Right now I am at my job where I should be tutoring students with English. Not one person has come in since 7 p.m. and so I sit here thinking of what I can blog about. Hmmm...

Well, I don't know what I want to do when I graduate. I'm supposed to preview at Truett in February to see if I am at all interested in seminary. Sometimes I feel inadequate with that type of thing. Is it weird that I don't feel that way about graduate school? I don't know where I would o if I attended graduate school, but it just seems like the easy way out. People always say to do what will make you happy, and I believe that that is true. I know that Truett sounds like a wonderful opportunity, but I know that I need to preview it before I make up my mind. It sounds so great that those thoughts creep in, saying "You, seminary? Forget it." And that's not the only doubt... what about finally getting on my own 2 feet, with a "real" job? I am excited about finding my place after graduation. It's crazy that it's not that far away, and soon my whole entire adult life will take place. The future used to be something I looked forward to; is it normal to be a little (or a lot) scared? I just needto pray about it. I know that actually going to the preview will help, too. These are my thoughts on my future though. I also don't know where I want to live. I thought I would like San Antonio, but I kind of want to get away from familiarity and explore a little. Somewhere country, with a little bit of city. A pretty view, and an easy trip to the store.... Plus you never know where God will place you... I don't see myself falling in love and getting married anytime soon. As much as I long for a relationship and all... I am not really wanting it right now. I kind of like being independent, doign thigns on my own. Maybe I am selfish with my time? Who knows... But like I said, God has a plan, and it is by far much better (and more secure) than my own. I couldn't be more thankful.

So yeah, these are my ramblings :)

Check!

I finished the research paper I have been putting off for the past month! It only took me 4 hours- that's like record time. Thank goodness for online journals and encyclopedias that my parents have had since I was a toddler! *breath of fresh air!*

There's nothing really new with me right now. I'm wondering what books I should read for the Christmas break. Does anyone have any good suggestions? I want to order them before December 13th, which is destined to be the first day I dive into a good read!

Happy Feet :)

This movie made me laugh because it's a bunch of penguins dancing; if a penguin can dance, so can I!! :) Haha!

I know that I have really needed the Thanksgiving break. It has provided a lot of time to rest and ponder life a little bit. I was thinking about how I get so upset with myself because I am never satisfied. This has been the case mainly because I haven't been satisfied with where I'm at with the Lord, but I was thinking about it, and isn't that a good thing? The fact that I am not satisfied always provides room for seeking Him more. What are your thoughts? How could discontentment play a part in this? When I think of being discontent, I think of circumstances, not the Lord.

Anyways, those are my ramblings.

Here's a random thought- I don't know if San Antonio is where I want to live or not when I graduate.... hmmm. Thank God for having more secure plans than I do! :)

On the road again....

That's right! Only one more meeting and two more classes a way until I'm on the road again!

San Antonio, here I come!!

Dancing makes me happy, too...

I wasn't going to go dancing tonight for a number of reasons, but I am so glad I did. I am getting better and better. Sooo exciting. I think my favoite is the triple two step, waltz, and two step progressive.

This is a picture of the steps to the waltz... it is harder than it looks to think about all that and talk at the same time. Or maybe I'm just weird... :)

If you are easily bored on Friday nights, you should join me one day. It is a blast and the teachers are sooo helpful.

Feel what You feel, Love what You love, go where You go, that's what we want...

Okay. There is something you need to know. Something I need to know. Something we all need to know.

So, being on Revival Steering Committee and MLC, and involved in my local church.. you'd think I would be just fine and dandy with God, right? Well, I think God might just be trying to tell me something right now....

I cried tonight because I realized I was completely wrong, and that I didn't have any ounce of goodness in me. I am trying to walk alone. I am trying to deal with my family being apart, with the war that caused that... trying to deal with friendships that have gone sour, trying to deal with the sin in my life on my own, as if I had the power to fix any of it. It's as if I'm trying to hold all of this in with my hands that are made of ice, and that they're just melting now. It's like God's hands of steel are right in front of me, and I haven't done a thing about it because for some reason I have felt that the ice would never melt or break. It's as if I'm all wrong... because I am.

I haven't kept Christ as the center of my life. I have told myself that I have, and have made it all about me (my decisions, my own doings) in the process. After telling your something that is false repeatedly, you begin to believe it, and then it ends up hitting you all at once.

And then sometimes I think I'm just being an emotional girl, but this stuff matters. It matters that I haven't been taking this seriously, the fact that God controls this, not me, and it would all be fine if I just let Him.

Pray that the dry bones would have life breathed into them. And let me know if you need prayer as well. Seriously. Thanks.

Soooo....

I wish I had something witty to say :)

Well, things are going really good. I am taking my last test before finals in exactly 46 minutes, and I am not worried about it :) I love that feeling. The test is in Classroom Technology (which is a very easy class). I honestly believe that they should no longer have this course as a required class because our generation typically knows a TON about computers. I mean, if you didn't- you're in the minority.

I bought these really cute brown shoes (I never buy shoes, because apparently flip flops don't count) and they gave me the worst blisters. Does anyone know what to do with really cute shoes that give you blisters? I'm thinking of putting some sort of cushion on the part that gives me blisters, but I didn't know if that was safe or not. Any suggestions? Maybe I'll google it.

Well, I'd best go study for that test :)

November! Here's what's new...

I haven't written in a while, and I figured it was time for an update :) We're in November! Isn't it crazy?

Anyways, nothing too interesting has happened in my life lately- but I have had some amazing conversations with some really great friends that have been a blessing in my life this past semester. Who knows how much can change in such a small amount of time? God knows exactly what you need to learn from, teach, or just to encourage and be encouraged. I don't want to brag about these wonderful women of God in my life, but they have been so sweet.

I know that I am not an introverted person, but I am definitely not an extrovert. I'm one of those odd balls that's right in the middle, and I wouldn't like it any other way. I really enjoy investing time into a few friendships; I am not one to scatter myself thin with my friends. Don't get me wrong, I have many "friends", but I am referring to the few that you have in life that you can talk to for hours.

Anyways, now that I've started writing, there's a lot just waiting to go on the screen. I think I'll save it for another post....

Birthday Weekend!

I'm sooo excited about being in my twenties... doesn't that just sound cool? (haha and that question sounds sooo mature ;)

Turning 20!!!

I'm excited :)

My exams are over.

Life is busy yet enjoyable. :)

I have amazing friends.

I have an amazing God.

I am blessed.

From Frazzled to Fabulous :)

So, I'm in what I now call the "bumps" in my college semester. To all of you college students and college alumni... you know what I am talking about. You're having this wonderful semester, you can actually stay up late because you're not doing homework, and then *WAM!* it hits you. You're going so fast that you didn't even notice the huge bump in the road (Bump, meaning the week in your planner that is completely FULL!)

This "bump" week for me is this week, and next week. I have 2 big exams (the kind that determine whether or not you have an A or a B) and a book to read by Friday, plus the homework. Then, next week, I have a SPANISH test, which is an event in itself, because when you have a Spanish test, you have a Spanish workbook, notebook, and biblical commentary to do. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy being a college student, but sometimes you forget what college STUDENT means outside of latenight walks and talks, runs, crazy friends, learning how to dance, ministries, friendships, etc.

I know I will be fine though. The Lord will sustain me throughout this week. He keeps having to grab me and say "Stop panicking, I am here." Today I told the kids at Children's Ministry about Psalm 46, the one that has "Be still and know that I am God". I have to constantly do that. I know that in the grand scheme of things, tests and grades don't really matter, just as long as you pass and get a degree, and even then it's not that big of a deal, in the grand scheme of things... but I want to excel in these things to give all the glory to Him. I have to depend on Him, or I will fail.

Tomorrow morning is our first Revival meeting, bright and early at 7 AM! I'm actually excited. Getting up early will motivate me to study in the time I would be asleep. :)

This all ties together, but I went to Canyon Creek's annual college retreat this weekend, Autumn Runaway. We split up guys and girls, and had a wonderful girl's night :) Our whole retreat was about going from "frazzled to fabulous". It was a very much needed reminder that I can still do things for God and not get stressed out. It's all about depending on Him and not trying to depend on myself, even to get up on time. He's been motivating me to get up :) This semester, I have been getting up 10 minutes before class. CRAZY! Talk about frazzled!! I was constantly in a rush. The past week 1/2, I have been getting up way before my classes, I haven't been late, and I've felt good about it.

I love our King. I'm glad to be His. I'm glad that I can rest in Him, even through the "bumps" of college! (And I hear they don't end after that! Gotta keep resting in Him :)

Wouldn't it be loverly?

I just wanted to put that as my title, because I like the word 'loverly'. It is wonderful :)

We had a short week this week and it was nice. This is the first semester that my classes haven't been too hard, and I actually feel like I have a life. I'm involved in the things I want to be involved in the things I want to be in. College is one of the best times everrrrrrrrrr (yes, it deserves that many R's!). I am having a lot of fun.

Last night me and some girlfriends went to the "Cotton Club" (a big hit with UMHB students on Thurs. nights). I walked in, and there were SO many students. I know almost everyone, and if I didn't know them, I knew of them. It was a little intimidating at first, but after a while it was okay. I prefer the place I went to a couple weeks ago a lot more, it's a much softer atmosphere, and not quite as hectic, but I enjoyed it last night. I line danced and two stepped- I'm learning bit by bit. I can't wait to learn more at the In the Mood Ballroom place again! I never thought I'd look at dancing as so much fun, but it IS! So far, I want to learn how to country western dance better, learn swing!, and learn ballroom. Sound like too much? I don't think so! I think it's becoming a little hobby of mine. It's just fun to follow the lead and the beat, and just go with the music. SO, I am going to buy myself some boots soon!

Oh, fun times. I just thought I would share :)

to ponder and ramble...

Do you ever feel like your life could be a movie, or at least a scene from one?

I felt that way tonight. I babysat today, and overall it was a pretty good day with them. We played a lot of "Thomas the Train" and "Dora" games, as well as read the books. I even caught myself being seriously intrigued by one of our Dora books!

Anyways... the above paragraph wasn't very relevant, and okay, because that's how I talk in person, and you'd probably get either frustrated or amused with me in our conversations... I'm defintely a rambler...

Anyways.. (I promise this time)... I was driving home from babysitting, and it was raining, and I'm beginning to love the rain, and it was just a time for me to think, explore, and enjoy. I loved it. That's when I thought my life could be a scene from a movie. I was thinking about how just a few years ago I was still in high school and thinking "I can't wait to drive to my very own place, after working, going to a play, or [insert mature thing to do here]." Yeah, pretty funny, huh? I seriously thought like that, and for the most part, still do. But I love it.

I'm turning 20 in less than 2 weeks, and while it might not sound like a big number to you, it's huge to me, but at the same time, it really isn't. I really hope that I never lose my childlike thoughts, my joy in life from simple things like rain, my constant ponderings. I hope that I am always like this, because that's what makes my life fun. I never want to lose it. I think God made me like that on purpose, because I can smile because of sOmething "little" He placed in my path. I am excited about turning 20, but the years are becoming nothing more than merely numbers. I hope I still think this way 20 years down the road....

Fall Break

If you don't mind reading about my wonderful fall break...

I have a retreat tomorrow for revival steering committee... in case you haven't heard, I'm extremely excited. I find out which team I am on, as well as who my team partner is! Get excited! It's going to be near Lake Travis, which is beeeautiful! I'm excited. I went there this past summer for camp with my girls, and it was amazing. :)

Then, on Saturday afternoon, I will come back here and head out to San Antonio to see my beautiful mom- and on that note, I'd like to ask for some major prayer. My mom's bone problems have hit what seems to be the peak of all problems. She has now been diagnosed with Osteoporosis, and it's not exactly the best news in the world. PLEASE PRAY. This is so stressful on her (and for anyone) especially since my dad's deployment, and her daughter away from home. Please pray that my time with her would be glorifying to the Lord and that I would be a daughter that serves, not one that gets upset. It's hard to be away and not be there, so this time is cherished.

I love you mom!!

Consistently learning this lesson...

So, yeah. I'm at the end ofm y day and I realize that I haven't been doing what I should. I haven't been depending on God. I haven't been turning my thoughts to Him in ALL that I do. It's become a choice of what I am to give to Him.

For everyone out there that believs the contrary... I struggle with this. I struggle with telling God to get my past something that I KNOW is wrong, such as a hateful thought towards someone/thing. I tend to not ask Him to put me in my place and remind me that it's NOT about the way I feel. It's just about giving Him the glory, in all situations. Where am I at? Well, I am at a place where I know I can conquer daily struggles. When a class doesn't go my way, I get upset with the whole class, not even considering my part in the issue. This is such wrong behavior. I need to set a higher standard for myself. He has conquered the world, and through Him I obtain strength! Right? YES! Now live it, Krista.

Thanks for reading.
On THE journey to live for Him,
Krista Michelle

Oh, Pride and Prejudice...

I'm listening to the beautiful soundtrack of Pride and Prejudice. The music is soooo beautiful, I might have to have one of the songs played at my wedding. Simply beautiful.

Lord, thank You for beautiful music! Thank You for beautiful 80 degree weather. Thank You for sunshine and smiles. Thank you for the breath in my lungs. I love You.

Beautiful Day :)

I had an amazing day yesterday. It was something I really needed, and God reminded me that even though it doesn't seem like things go my way for a certain time, He defintely knows what I need more than I do.

Yesterday I had my normal period of classes, and then me, Lauren, and Alicia all went out to the girls soccer game against UT Tyler. It was way cool! Free hot dogs, spirited fans- it was nice. Then Lauren and I both found out we made Revival Steering Committee, which is a huge deal! We celebrated and spun around and rejoiced! I am looking forward to how God will use me for this huge event.

Then, Lauren and I went Country Western Dancing. Do you know that awkward "I don't know how to dance, I will look stupid if I try" feeling? We felt that way for a good 30 minutes, but for the last 3 hours we were dancing like none other! It was soooo much fun. I want to go back and actually take classes. I was telling Lauren how last night could've been life changing for us- it definitely was! Now I'm not afraid to try! It was sooo much fun just spinning around, stepping the right steps without thinking about it. I love it!

Well, I thought I would share my wonderful day. ) I hope you enjoyed!

HAIR. (Please give input)

If you know me, you know I go through the hair dillemma at least 3 times a year. In case you don't know what I am referring to....

I'm thinking of cutting my hair!

Now, last time I said this, I chickened out and just added layers.... but I really want to do something different.

I wish to leave you with 2 options:

1. Tell me I should keep my long hair.

2. Tell me what kind of cut would look cute!

Thanks y'all!

Beautiful!

I love this picture. Beautiful!

This one's for the girls...

I am so thankful for friends. God has blessed me tremendously. There have been many doors opening to new friendships, as well as the rekindling of old ones. I'm so excited.

I've always desired to walk on campus late at night, when not many people are out, but always kind of felt unsafe because of how dark it gets. Lately I have felt the need to do that, and without me even asking, random friends have asked me to go walking. I'm so excited. Noelle and I went walking tonight. We left at about 10:30 and got back at 12:22! That just shows you how blessed I am. We talked about all that's going on in eachother's lives- Our joys, our fears, etc. (Thanks Noelle!) Noelle, you are so encouraging in my life. Thank you for just offering your experiences in relation to mine, and not judging me when I have something to confess. You are my sister in Christ!

My friend Lauren has been so great and truly listened to me when I talk. Those type of friends are hard to come by, and I'm so very glad that I have a friend in her. I trust her with what is on my heart, and I enjoy her insight. Thanks for relating to me so well!

Stephanie Green- you're wonderful. I'm so glad that we got to talk the other night. You've always been there for me over the years, and I can't wait to see where God leads both of us throught the many years to come. Thank you for your wise words, and witty jokes. :)

All of my friends are wonderful, I just thought I'd highlight a few. It's only Wednesday, and all 3 of these people have blessed me so much throughout this week. Please know that all of you encourage me so much!

God is so good.

Children's Ministry Update

Y'all, I am so blessed, beyond my own comprehension.

Children's Ministry has been so great this year. We have more college kids than little kids each week. That is a BIG deal. This summer, I prayed for these kids, these volunteers, and for just real love to take place. Well, the past couple weeks, I realized that I didn't know all of the volunteers, so tonight we all went to Jaliscos. I'd say there were about 15 of us tonight- it was so much fun, just eating some cheap food, and having some good fellowship. We talked and laughed, and had a good time. God has given in abundance, and my heart is smiling so big right now.

We had a few awkward moments today, like when Hannah dropped her water, when I "asked someone out on a date" (they thought I was asking them to Jaliscos with only me, yeah-awkward).... But I love it! I love awkward momnets, because they are unintentional inside jokes.



Love love love,
Krista Michelle